Thursday, November 22, 2007
Giving Thanks
The silly questions vary from year to year, but the FINAL question is always the same: "The Year is almost over . . . what I want to remember most is _______".
Last year Dr. J answered "Seeing my wife smile again." I know only half the people understood what he meant, but it did then and still makes me cry to think about it -- it was that touching of a moment.
This year I already know what my answer will be.
But thinking about "the Thanksgiving Interview" got me thinking about the spirit of Thankgiving in general. We should all pause today and give thanks for things, both big and small, that make a difference in our lives. So here is my list of things I am thankful for:
*All of the wonderful folks who make up the U.S. Military, as well as anyone who has EVER served. Without them, WE are nothing, and neither is anyting we cherish.
* The families of the above mentioned heroes. Thank YOU, for your important part, too.
* Father Mike, for helping me. Even if it will always hurt.
* All of my hilarious and divine second cousins . . . we partied Wednesday night for Zanne's birthday, and we will party tomorrow like the Pilgrims & Indians. I love yinz -- you open my heart to the holidays once again (which I thought no one could).
* My lovely, sweet, and increasingly blunt Lori. Please use the word "obnoxious" more often -- it totally cracked me up to hear you speak like that!!!
* My longtime partner in barely legal pursuits, My Hamster, and the best zany person I know . . . MY Lisa.
* Arlene & Joey . . . I can't put into words what you have done for us, simply by caring.
* Nicole . . . for using the phrase "that phucking cunt" like NOBODY else could! Damn, girl, I am glad you are on OUR side!!!
* HotMary . . . for teaching us all about self-value. And for the hickey story. Yeah, that was a classic moment. Oh, and Chinese food. And the importance of a man sending you flowers.
* Food Venues I covet: Franktuary, Dozen, Chan's, Amici's, Clarke's, Rubio's, Mahajarajajajaja (or however the hell it's spelled). Each of you has had a dee-lish impact on my life in the past year. And Renzo's, don't you think I have forgotten about you, hon -- you're on my "to do" list for late-December, sweetie!
* For November's $43 electric bill, $22 gas bill, a heated mattress pad, and my fluffy bathrobe. Gawd, I am goooooood!!!!!!!!!!!!
* My Boss . . . for believing in me, and sticking by me, even when things aren't perfect. Gawd, what a difference from "High School".
* Dr. J . . . for your endless reassurance. It helps. More than mere words could ever articulate. Its' effect is too profound and far-reaching for me to ever admit.
* For our DTC. Each day, no matter how good or how bad, is one day closer.
* And for the stupid t.v shows that make Dr. J and I laugh. A special "Shout Out" should probably go to VH1 for the "40 Most Softsational Soft Rock Songs," "Best Week Ever," and "Talk Soup."
Now go gobble gobble, dammit.
Monday, November 19, 2007
People I'd Like To Strangle
I know she liked my predecessor a great deal. Look lady, he was FIRED months before I came on board. I had nothing to do with it. I know you resent the boss because of it. I know you resent me though I have nothing to do with it. But Gawd Almighty, I do good work, am unfailingly polite, and was selected from among 142 other applicants for this job -- WTF more do you want?!
PLEASE RETIRE YE OLDE WINDBAG!!! (My boss has asked me to hang on for a time period of not more than 6 months, during which time he thinks he will have a proper "exit plan" for her).
This gave me an idea for a "To Be Strangled" list (like a "to do" list):
- The office bookkeeper
- The nasty woman I spoke to at my local Water & Sewer Authority this morning
- My In-Laws, at present
- My old boss at "High School" (my code name for prior employer)
- A handful of local elected officials
- "Grapes" from "High School"
- The limo company from my wedding (still can't discuss)
- A handful of national elected officials
***Disclaimer -- I would never physically harm someone first. It would only be in self-defense. Thus, all of this is a JOKE!!! ***
Saturday, November 17, 2007
National Adoption Day
Here is some local press coverage, as well as link to additional information on the history of it.
It gets me so friggin' mad sometimes when people hear that we are adopting and immediately jump to "Well have you tried this _____?" (fill in the blank yourself, 'cause trust me, WE have heard EVERY suggestion under the Sun -- some so ignorant it would make a Buddhist monk lose their temper!)
It astounds folks to learn that "NO, we haven't tried ____" and we are NOT interested in trying "______". Really. It's the truth! We feel called to adopt, and have all along.
I recently had someone say to me "I'm sorry you have to go this route to become a parent." WTF?! I am sorry that we have had so much tears and grief and physical pain, but I am PROUD AS PHUCKING HELL that we are adopting -- that we are doing something moral and good and right . . . something that will be worth "all the tea in China," as they say. I am proud that we are trailblazers amongst our family and friends. I am even proud that people will be uncomfortable as we laugh and giggle in the park someday, as a transracial family ('cause there IS more to come, folks -- hullo, Brangelina!)
I wish people could get it out of their heads that adoption is somehow "second best," or a backup plan. It's so not. We always planned on adopting, and talked about it long before we ever began trying to expand our family (another thing that sets me off, the whole "when you have a family of your own someday" dismissive throwaway line -- PHUCK YOU assholes of the world, WE ARE ALREADY A FAMILY -- just one without living children at present!!!)
The only reason we pursued "trying" the old-fashioned way is because it's cheaper and lacks the whole judgmental quality of pursuing an adoption. THAT IS IT!!! I find it so amazingly selfish that people express a desire to have a biological child because they want said Fantasy Child to have their "wife's eyes" or their "husband's math skills" or whatever other dreamland bullshit they toss around. Even further nerve-grating is when these jerks are often the very same people who claim to be part of the "Go Green" movement, are anti-war at all costs, believe in a One World global vision, and chide Dr. J and I for having politically conservative views. You'd think these would be the very people who EMBRACE adoption, for a variety of obvious reasons. But nope, there they go, taking pity on us for adopting, insulting us purposefully and unconsciously, and failing to "walk the walk." Drives us insane, I tell you. I know, I am hardly known for holding back . . . but believe me when I tell you just how much I hafta hold back when someone makes yet another stupid remark.
So Viva National Adoption Day! Can't wait to be a part of it!!!
And to those of you who have been amazingly supportive of "Plan A" from the start . . . THANK YOU! You will rewarded, though not as much we ;o)
PostSecret vs. Found -- There goes the Neighborhood 2007
PostSecret is such a guilty pleasure . . . it provides that psychological voyeur window into other people's minds that so intrigues me. Sometimes the secrets are LOL funny, sometimes heartbreaking, sometimes insightful, sometimes silly, and often inspiring. I have found myself continually connecting to people that I have never met, yet feel like I know all too well.
It was a thrill to meet the PostSecret founder/curator, Mr. Frank Warren on Saturday night, as he shared never before revealed secrets with those of us who crowded into a room to hear him speak. I actually found "PostSecret" by way of "Found," another ultra-cool site on the web. The "Found" boys were also there to add their own contribution to the event, which was also highly entertaining, and a perfect compliment to PostSecret. Well done, and well worth the money :o)
Viva Las Vegas -- Recap
I got busy, so it didn't happen. Forgive me.
So I will try my best to give a proper summary of Thee Vegas Trip . . .
Wednesday:
Probably my busiest days in terms of meetings. Saw some interesting presentations by my colleagues from other states, who fight the same legislative battles as I. I tried to write down key buzz phrases, so I can use them in my region, too. Had lunch with my pal Ryan, where we shared a few giggles over our mutual desire to ALWAYS go on the out of town trips, whenever possible! Later on in the day there was a big ass conference session in which we saw these televised commercials and documentaries about our industry and the folks who won national awards for their good deeds -- I must say, I was impressed by the quality of the video presentations, as well as inspired by the folks who were honored. Wow. It made me proud to work for and with these people. Bill Cosby was brought in as the big speaker. I like Bill Cosby, totally repsect his life's work and all that . . . but he's not quite my ultimate cup of tea. I was getting fidgety (what a shock -- NOT), so I skipped out a few minutes early to beat the crowd as they exited.
I made my way back to the hotel, grateful that my official "work day" had come to an end. I enjoyed a tasty meal, then decided to retire back to my room. It felt soooo good to slip out of my big girl suit, kick off my shoes, and eventually stretch out on the bed. But I still failed to get much sleep that night. Keyed up, I guess?!
Thursday:
My schedule did not require me to be anywhere until noon on Thursday. So I lounged in bed for most of the morning. Just kinda indulged myself with some relaxing "me time". Mmmmm. My relaxing morning was even capped off by an act of culinary pleasure . . . a big, sweet, sticky Belgian Waffle, complete with the syrup, strawberries, and a heaping mound of whipped cream. Did I already say "Mmmmmm"?!?! It bears much repeating. It was a perfect culmination of longing met with tasty bliss.
After popping over to the convention for a luncheon, I then moseyed about the shops at the Venetian, the highlight of which was playing dress up with the Mikimoto black pearl pendant necklace . Meow. I quickly texted the girls to mark the moment.
After struggling through the afternoon sessions (how I could not be distracted at this point?), I made my way back to the hotel to get changed for a night on the town. One of my midwest-based colleagues had been the recipient of a handful of surplus show tickets (courtesy of one of his BoD members who had purchased too many), and I was to be the very lucky recipient of one of them! Cue the squeals!!! First we all went to dinner at the Eiffel Tower Restaurant (I decided that so long as the restaurant was IN the good ol' U.S.A., I wasn't breaking my ban on all things French). Dinner was dee-lish! Really, it was. After dinner we hurried over to the Bellagio to see . . . CIRQUE DU SOLEIL!!! Yep, I was gonna see "O"! I don't know what the "O" stands for, but it should be for OMG! Wow, I was blown away. It was so amazing. I was dressed up, watching a world-class show . . . the whole thing was like a giant surreal moment, nearly indescribable. I was sad for the evening to end, since everything had been so exciting and unique.
Friday:
Another morning in which I had the good fortune of lingering in bed a bit. The only thing which lured me out of bed was that I was determined to treat myself to a few Krispy Kremes for breakfast, which seemed like the perfect punctuation to mark the end of a trip to "Sin City." I hadn't had a Krispy Kreme in soooo long . . . I wanted to savor every exquisite and satisying bite. Mmmmm! (Again). All in all, it was a good trip. Perfect balance of work and play. Too bad reality will smack me in the face when I get back to the office on Monday.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Viva Las Vegas - Part One
- Soduku -- phuck, I can't even spell this. Nonetheless, I spotted an otherwise attractive & straight man on the plane doing one of these puzzles. Ick, ew, WTF?! Sorry, but if you are doing Soduku [sp?] puzzles, YOU ARE GAY. And not in the good, it's okay kind of way either. I am also suspicious of men who do the crossword puzzle. It's just not natural. If you are a man who does the Jumble -- please move to Canada. Immediately.
- People with Kids -- WHY the phuck are you in Vegas?! Honestly, there is NO reason to be pushing a stroller through a casino. Not one.
- Colleagues -- I loathe the person at the state level who has my job. Pain in the ass. And they are staying at my hotel. Oi vey. If they ask me where I am staying I am going to lie and say somewhere else. I already did so once tonight, to a male colleague (see him maybe 3 times a year) who annoys me, just to throw them off the trail. I told them both "Harrah's," which is where my boss is staying. If they find out later I am actually NOT at that hotel, I figure I can play it off by saying I thought they were inquiring where my boss was staying.
- Being Low-Rent -- a D.C.-based colleague whom I respect told me where she is staying (same hotel as I) and is pissed about it. I guess she does not approve of our accomodations. I think they are fine. But since said colleague is about 150 pounds overweight and probably hasn't been laid in the past two decades I am left questioning her opinion -- maybe obese people bitch about things that goodlooking people shrug off?! I don't know, but the bitchy thought occurred to me. I don't feel remotely guilty for this thought . . . after all, I earned the right to think and articulate these thoughts, and will keep right on doing it. I am tough on fat people. But I have the necessary "Street Creds" that allow me to do so, so kiss my ass, por favor. My point is that our accomodations are fine. Remember, I have stayed at Thee Scariest Hotel in Thee World (location: KENTUCKY), so I guess I am now doubly street creded?!
- Booze Factor -- listen, there is going to be a lot of this going on. I must have lost some of my ability "to hang" as of late . . . a glass & 1/2 and I was buzzed tonight, yikes! Eh, so what?! I am the world's happiest, most fun drunk, so pppfffftttt!
Well Angels, that's all for now. Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Monday, November 12, 2007
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Taking the Edge Off
While not negating the validity of my feelings, clearly, I needed to chill out.
So I played hooky a bit on Friday afternoon and went home to attend to matters (namely, my pending WiFi hookup). It's half-done, but hey, it's progress. Being out of the office, and thereby unaccountable to all for a few hours, also happened to give me the opportunity to improve my mood before company came to my house later that evening.
And that helped set me up for my much needed Saturday. It was "ME DAY." I started off with the massage that I have been begging for, and then it was off to see Melissa for my pre-Vegas manicure and pedicure appointments. Ahhhhhh. I capped off ME DAY by downloading a bunch of new songs to my Ipod, to make the plane ride more pleasurable
NOW . . . I am ready for next week. It will be busy, it will be crazy, there will be work, but I always manage to find slivers of fun, no matter what the circumstances.
As I think ahead to what awaits me in Vegas, I can't help but invoke the words of my fave guy cousin, Dave . . . "C'mon Benny, we ain't building railroads, here!"
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
Pride . . . and Prayers
Two quick items before I retire for two hours of television-viewing ("The Unit" and "Cane" -- meow to all the men) . . .
- HAMSTER -- I am so very proud of you, and your grit. Can't wait to hear all of the details about your day, and the those to come
- DADDY -- My Dad is having very major surgery tomorrow. It will change a lot of things in our family afterwards. Despite all of the crap he and the stepmonster have put us through over the past few years . . . I still need him. He's a terrific Dad, and I am lucky to have had him as long as I have.
So I will be doing a lot of praying tonight. And respecting my Dad's wishes by NOT hanging out at the hospital. But my heart will be there, just the same.
Monday, November 05, 2007
Chili, Champagne . . . and Cupcakes?!?!
"Hamster" and "Da Weeter" sent us an invitation for our cozy dinner party, which got its start as some ridiculous excuse to eat Da Weeter's chili, and for Hamster and I to down some bubbly.
And it's kinda taken off from there.
This year I texted Hamster "what should I bring?" She texted back "Bring your sombreros and surveillance sidedish."
Now, "Surveillance" is a looonnnng story, for another time. I doubt other people find it as funny as Hamster and I do, but who gives a shit?! It's one of our "Dangerously Legal" practices that goes back to when I got my first car and used to haul our asses all over the place in my oh-so-red Chevy Cavalier.
Back to Hamster's text, though. So she throws in the word "sombreros" . . . hmmm. I quickly texted Lori, Sandi, and my Mom in search of a sombrero, just to be a smart ass. Which prompted my Mom to ask the Spanish teacher at the high school where she works if she had a sombrero on hand? YES, she had two! And threw in a couple of those Mexican blanket-ponchos and some maracas, too. SWEEEEET! (Or as Dr. J would say "Saaaammmmm!")
I already had a rather full day planned . . . began with a pre-op chat with my Dad over coffee at Crazy Mocha, then Dr. J & I went to Oakland to attend a lecture by author Jeff Gammage (but first we visited The O for a super-quick lunch), then off to Squirrel Hill for a slice at Mineo's, (see Dr. J, I said "SLICE" and didn't call it a "CUT" -- though I did say "cuts" when I ordered, you just didn't notice!!!)
And FINALLY, we had the procurement of Thee Cupcakes from Dozen (I could wait no longer, the urge was taking over my life to lick the frosting off one of those puppies!) I was thrilled to have an excuse to pick up cupcakes, and that we were only a few miles away for the lecture, well . . . it seemed to me that the stars had aligned for the perfect "C" compliment to the "Chili and Champagne" triennial event!
I promised Hamster that "these are like the best sex of your life. Really." The look on her face later told me I had not oversold them, hee hee!
I thought The Hamster was going to piss her pants when we gringos appeared at her door, clad in sombreros (granted, Dr. J was mortified by my latest insistence that he get into the spirit of the event -- but hey, Hamster LOVED it, which was all I cared about).
The boys wolfed down their chili, so they could then retire downstairs and grunt as they watched the hockey game. Whatever. It gave Hamster and I some much-needed girl time. WHICH WE NEED MUCH MORE OF (hint, hint). Seriously, she is such a light in my life . . . she makes dumb shit ridiculously fun. I swear Hamster is one of those people who truly could make watching paint dry seem fun. She's just that bust-up funny. Best of all is her "faux serious face," I think.
Everyone thinks I am the troublemaker (okay, so maybe I am) -- but I couldn't do it all these years without such a willing partner, who pushes me to the "dangerously legal" limits that she does. We've never crossed the lines of what is legal, but gawd we have certainly edged close to it! (I will freely admit having danced right over the lines of good taste on countless occasions, though).
Our friendship has survived so many changes, and has even surprised me in how it has actually thrived throughout it, especially over the past couple of years. I could not have made it without My Hamster (I am nothing if not possessive). I have felt so hopeless and helpless and downright crazy at times, and I am often convinced that I am of no help to ANYBODY. And yet, here is this amazing, capable, focused, brilliant chickie reaching out, asking me to help her?! Gawd, it makes me feel like a million bucks to be able to do for others, especially her.
Mucho Gracias, Senora! Now pass me a damn cupcake, and stop hogging the Chandon.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Setting Sail!!!
Dear J and J,
I received your authenticated dossier today. It looks good. So I will ship your dossier to China on Friday, November 2,2007. Congratulations!
I wanted to thank you for your hard work on your dossier and your patience. I appreciated it!
Best regards,
Masha
OMG!!! What a series of emotions we are having right now!!! Soooo excited, so happy, so stunned . . . THIS IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING!!!
Now, folks, we still have quite the wait ahead of us . . . but SHE IS COMING!
Monday, October 29, 2007
Who Knew?
I had no idea.
What prompted this discovery was my obsessive desire to ward off any huge, high gas bills this winter. Look, I am a first-time homeowner and first-time homedweller (since BIRTH, people!). All of this is new, and often scary to me. Really. I do NOT love being a homeowner. I know, I know, I am supposed to be giggly happy about how wonderful and exciting it is to own and fix-up and decorate a home.
I hate it.
I miss the simplicity of an apartment. I miss not having these types of choices. I miss having rather fixed costs each month, and not having to speculate in terror what my gas bill will be, WTF I will do if something breaks, and I still have solved our lawn care problem (to buy or not to buy the lawnmower -- dammit, can't I just get a hot guy to come cut the lawn every 3 weeks?! Can I not have ONE "Desperate Housewife" moment?!?!)
Our house is half-decorated, half-painted, sorta-styled, and no where near how we want it to be -- if only we had (1) the money, (2) the know-how, (3) the time.
Back to the space heater. So electricity is waaaaayyyy cheaper in this region than cranking the gas high enough to heat the house. Yes, it's on a minimum level. Yes, I know about closing off rooms that we don't use, shutting vents, wearing slippers & six layers of clothing. We already have a dual-control heated mattress pad (and my gawd, that thing is dee-vine, lemme tell ya!)
So we decided to get a space heater for our bedroom, just to run for a few minutes at night, or while we sleep. And possibly to bring into the living room. We spend an average of 3 waking hours in the house on a weekday. There are like 6 gazillion models of space heaters out there. Really. We went to four stores to compare, and this is after Dr. J researched the whole thing online.
I already knew about getting one with the auto-shutoff if it tips over. But now I also know to get one with the infared beam that shuts it off if it becomes obstructed (by a fallen blanket, a child's toy, etc.) I also now know that a quartz heater is designed to heat objects, that there are varying degrees of "quietness," you can buy a sleek space heater that can be wall-mounted (looks like a flat screen t.v.), and they even make space heaters with REMOTE CONTROLS. Really -- no shit, they sell ones with remote controls! ("Oooh, snap!")
It was at the fourth store, as we stared at the numerous options on the shelves, that I remarked to Dr. J, "It took us less time to select a country from which to import a baby."
And folks, that IS the freakin' truth.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Culinary Porn
That's right -- Dozen has begun posting photos of their new Fall flavors. Sonofabitch.
As if my days weren't already full of distractions, I now have to keep myself from viewing these photos as if they were centerfolds. Because that IS what it feels like -- I am trying to NOT think about them, to keep myself busy, and feed my desire with other things.
But dammit they are calling me!!! I already am obsessed with the decadent innocence of the Vanilla Vanilla . . . and now I am just going crazy over thoughts of the Raspberry Zinger and Chocolate Chip Cookie. (I don't even like coconut all that much I am willing to give the Raspberry Zinger a try & hopefully be surprised).
Grrrrrrrrrrr.
Birthday Re-Cap
But I am also trying to not be such a downer to those around me. So I agreed to dip my toes back into the birthday pool this year. But there couldn't be a party, and I told my mother point blank that if there is a cake on Sunday (we are going out to dinner) I will never speak to her again. Really. I am hopeful she will respect my wishes and comply.
I received an early surprise the day prior to my birthday when one of the most vocal and critical members of my Board of Directors showed up at a meeting with a personalized birthday cake for me -- whoa! This is a woman who my (staff-level) colleagues refer to as "The one who eats her young" -- yeah, a real ball-buster. And she brought ME a cake?!?! I was very touched, to tell the truth.
Wednesday, my actual birthday, was chock full of important meetings and even a public hearing. But my friends and family managed to squeeze in the appropriate text messages and phone calls of cheer. I was stunned when I went back to my office late in the day and there was a gorgeous floral arrangment from . . . my husband! You could have knocked me over with a feather. I was really surprised by this. They were so beautiful, and full of "Nancy Reagan Red" flowers that look great with the leaves changing colors all around our town at present.

But it was just what I needed for my birthday this year . . . low-key, simple, and delicious.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Birthday Forecast
So I thought it might be fun to note and record my the various sources are fortelling about my birthday, today:
From Astrology.com, my birthday reading:
You have a sensible and realistic outlook on life and your two feet are always planted firmly on the ground (though you may, on occasion, have your head in the clouds). Others often see you as a rock of strength, solid, reliable, dependable, and constant. You are, in fact, amazingly consistent for you possess great powers of endurance and do not like to make changes or adjustments in your regular routine. You do things deliberately and methodically and do not easily accommodate the unexpected. Though you have a gentle, even soft, appearance, you are enormously strong-willed and stubborn. You go at your own pace and refuse to be rushed or pushed into anything before you feel sure about it. You can be coaxed and persuaded by charm, beauty, love, or affection - but never forced. You won't fight either, but simply stubbornly resist any attempt to coerce you to do something you do not want to do. Quiet, deep, emotionally complex and intensely private, you are not a person who is easy to get to know and understand. You are extremely sensitive but disinclined to show it, and you allow only a special few into your inner world. Like a wary animal, you are cautious and mistrustful of those you do not know until you "sniff them out". You are very, very instinctive and intuitive. You usually have a strong, immediate gut reaction to people, even though you may be unable to clearly articulate why you feel as you do. Your feelings and perceptions go deeper than words.
From Yahoo.com's 2007 Overview for Scorpio:
Passion carries you far this year in the realms of creativity and expression. Getting in touch with and appreciating more of your passionate nature will transform you in a way that results in putting more money in the bank. You could easily work as an advisor for big companies or in public relations. You understand what motivates people to do a good job and will find yourself in situations where people want your advice. Your creative insight expresses itself in dynamic ways and you will gain lots of recognition.
You have a very good support system in both your career and home life, and will learn that perfect order is taking place in your life at this time. Since your career has gotten off to such a great start this year, by summertime you will have more time on your hands to become romantically involved in a new relationship (or rekindling of old), which you've been thinking about for quite some time. You will be receiving some new and dynamic surprises and will be inspired to do some new and out-of-the-ordinary things in both your career and personal life.
You could enjoy spending time traveling to foreign lands and be drawn to observing others' ideas and cultures. You love to study. You will find that your relationship gives you lots of space to breathe, and yet you still have lots of spare time to take care of your own needs as well. You'll need tons of physical interaction to satisfy that wild passion of yours. Having massages, going to hot springs and being close to nature will bring a lot of balance and harmony to your life.
From the NY Post.com, my birthday reading:October 24, 2007 -- It's okay to be serious about your aims in life but not so serious that you lose your ability to have fun. Every time you feel the corners of your mouth begin to turn down this year you must think of something amusing that gets you smiling again. It's not so hard - life is meant to be fun.
From CafeAstrology.com, my forecast from 10/24/07 - 10/24/08:
Uranus is a strong player in your Solar Return chart this year, as this electric planet is in hard aspect to the Sun, Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. As such, some level of unpredictability and/or tension is likely to be a theme in the year ahead. Your life speeds up with this influence, as you adapt to the many changes in your life. You march to the beat of your own drummer this year. Your behavior may be willful, however, which could get you into predicaments from time to time! You may often be tempted to throw out practical or traditional considerations in favor of more exciting or stimulating plans. Unexpected changes in plans or events can test your patience. However, they could stimulate you to try new approaches and they certainly act to cut boredom. Your creativity is stimulated this year, but so is your excitability and your need for freedom. You are likely to be more outspoken than usual, perhaps even rebellious.
Busy, busy, busy! The Sun conjunct Mercury in your Solar Return chart suggests that you have a lot to do this year. At times, you may feel like the pace of your life is running ahead of you. You can be especially productive, however, in all types of communications--writing, speaking, learning, teaching, and so forth.
Mercury sextiles Pluto, suggesting that your mental faculties are attuned to otherworldly impressions, offering you increased insight, psychological understanding and awareness, and focused attention. You are inclined to do a lot of “digging”, researching, analyzing, investigating, and getting to the bottom of things. Increased psychological awareness of yourself and others can benefit you greatly, and employing strategy in your decision making is easier than usual this year. Relationships with younger people may be especially rewarding and meaningful.
Venus opposes Uranus and squares Jupiter in your Solar Return chart, and some disruptions in your friendships and attachments are possible this year. Over-inflated expectations is something to watch out for. You may overvalue something (or someone), perhaps in an attempt to dramatize your life. You may be especially sociable, in the mood to party, dramatic, extravagant, and inclined to overindulge as a result of a feeling of inner discontent and a desire for more from life than daily routines. Unusual attractions (to people and things) can have you acting on a whim. You may deal with freedom versus closeness issues in your relationships. It may be that you experience sudden changes or breakups with a friend or lover. However, the chance of a sudden new friendship is just as likely. At the root of this is a stronger taste for the unusual. What is familiar is less exciting to you than what is new and different. If a relationship seems to threaten your sense of freedom, you may have an easy time separating from it. Some fireworks in both your social and financial lives are to be expected, keeping things fresh and exciting. The best way to handle this energy is to open yourself up to the need for change in your love life or with regards to how you spend and make money--or both. Get in touch with this need for new experiences and/or attitudes so that changes are not forced upon you.
With the Sun sextile the North Node of the Moon, you are likely to form new relationships or connections that further your spiritual growth, or to enhance existing relationships with a spirit of camaraderie. People in authority regard you favorably for the most part. Events take place in which you feel like you are moving forward and growing into a new phase of your life.
The year ahead is one of rapid growth and insistent self-expression. Your social life is bound to involve some fireworks as changes are required of existing relationships. Opportunities to advance in your career come when you employ strategy in your decision making. The need to make changes, and for more freedom in your life in general, can lead to restlessness this year. Life is very busy and quick in pace. Be sure to avoid overly impulsive actions.
2007 is a Number Seven year for you. Ruled by Neptune. This is a year of preparation, chance, and refinement. It is not a time of dramatic changes. Instead, it's a year when reflection on the past is helpful, and when refinements to your life path should be made. It's a good year to study and analyze. Unexpected twists to your life story and "chance" meetings are probable. Advice - take stock of your life in order to prepare for more exciting years to come, examine the past and plan for the future, get in touch with your deepest needs and uncover your personal power, don't strain yourself or actively try to expand.
2008 will be a Number Eight year for you. Ruled by Saturn. This is a year of power and accomplishment. Actively seeking to expand, taking educated risks, and moving forward are highlighted. This is a year of opportunity, particularly in the material and business world, and opportunities need to be seized. It's generally not a year to find a new love partner, simply because the focus is on the material world and your place in the world. This is a problem-solving year in which you can expect real, tangible results. Advice - take action, plan ahead, seize opportunities.
And Finally:
Your personal ruling planets are Mars and Venus.
You are without a doubt a person of strong magnetic presence and will always be at your best when in the company of the other sex.
Your dramatic flair and larger than life gestures attract the attention of those around you and result in your being considered the life of the party.
You are a very devoted family person and loyal to the needs of loved ones. You adhere to the principles of domestic life and the needs of children too.
In matters of finance, you are very capable in stretching a dollar and always appear to be well to do even if you're scratching. Venus being your ruler grants you exceptional taste and refinement in your life choices and attire too!
Music, art and literature will always be an important ingredient of your life!
Your lucky colours are white and cream, rose and pink.
Your lucky gems are diamond, white sapphire or quartz crystal.
Your lucky days of the week Friday, Saturday, Wednesday.
My Dad called me at lunchtime today. And he read me MY horoscope. What a great moment, espcially since he has no idea I have this blog and had written about this topic :o)
Sunday, October 21, 2007
The List
When we lived in Kal-ee-forn-yah this started to change, though. First, due to the weather and absence of truly spectacular colors (yes, the leaves do change there, but not like here). And it would still be, like, 90 degrees in October out there. (Okay, so it's supposed to hit the 80's this week, but oh well). But we had such a teeny-tiny box of an apartment when we lived there, that there just wasn't room for much more, and knowing that "The Plan" (hey, I always have a plan!) was to move back East, well, I didn't want to accumulate more "stuff". Having moved approximately 6 gazillion times as a child, I loathe packrats, people who can't part with their shit, and knick-knack stuff on the whole.
So I got in the habit of wanting "experiences" for my birthday, Christmas, anniversary, or V-Day. Ya know, tickets to a play or concert, or something unique that would give me a great memory. That's something easy to pack, and it never gets lost. But we've been back East for 4 years now, so the "no stuff" excuse is gone. Still, the budget issues remain -- no, make that they are TIGHTER than ever. Oh, we are managing, thanks to my ability to stick to a budget and squirrel away money like an acorn. But it's never been tighter, considering.
All of this crystalized in my always swirling brain recently when I was asked "what do you want for your birthday?" HUH?! Aside from my usual vices of VS undies and wine from Sonoma . . . well, it's kinda sad, I guess, but I just don't dream that way. I don't think about what I can't have, even if it's due to self-imposed limits. But sometimes Adrian and Kirsten play a game where they "virtual shop" for the things they want but can't have (I guess this is the online version of window sopping nowadays?!), so I thought I'd give it a try!
Sooooo, for anyone who is STILL looking for that perfect birthday gift for me, here are some ideas:
- Select Comfort Mattress -- I have NOT been sleeping well for some time now, and part of the blame goes to my mattress (though I did completely crash this past Friday night, and got probably the most sound sleep I have had in months).
- Pedicures twice a month, to accompany my manicures. This would also mean I get to spend twice as much time with Melissa, which would be divine!
- Black pearls -- I'd probably get more opportunities to wear a pendant necklace (which is more my speed anyway), but you can't deny how gorgeous a whole gleaming strand is!
- Sirius radio -- or any type of satellite radio gizmo that allows me to float between hip-hop music, jazz, 80's throwbacks, Big Band (yes, I am a closet fan!), while still getting my Dennis Miller fix as needed (love ya, guy!)
- Weekly massages. Really. This goes without saying.
- A limo to drive me around in. Or, if not, I'd take a nice Jaguar so I can cruise in style. Ice blue in color, and old-school with the hood ornament (if anyone really wants to make me happy).
- Diamond stud earrings. Platinum setting preferred, but it's negotiable. Normally I am all about the hoops. But I saw Adrian's and I admit I coveted a bit
- Unlimited shopping at H&M. And if the shopping trip could be with HM, that'd be even better.
- A night at Nemacolin. With the big tub. Screw the French restaurant in the hotel though.
- Finally (and I really don't think this is too much to ask) two uninterrupted nights with any of the following men: Jimmy Smits, Anthony LaPaglia, Dennis Haysbert, Blair Underwood, Victor Garber, Eric Close, Daniel Dae Kim, and pretty much the entire cast of The Unit.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
THE FIRST TIME
To understand this, folks, know when you get an "EOB" (Explanation of Benefits) in the mail, telling you what the doctor billed your insurance for, how much your responsibility was, and how much the insurance company PAID your doctor? Yep, THAT'S what Blue Cross slid into his business bank account today.
And, it was not some piddly $12 or any shit like that. It was GOOOOOOD.
Of course, this gets rolled right back into the business -- hey, Dr. J has a loan to pay off, rent to keep paying, and equipment to keep leasing. (But in my Fantasyland Daydreams I am spending the money on myself, hee hee -- hey, a Trophy Wife's gotta dream, right?!)
But it's a significant moment, nonetheless. And I am very proud.
Two good things in one week (see immediate prior post), and only days apart, is this possible?! I feel nervous just speaking about it in anything above the most hushed of whispers!
Adrian, we're crackin' open that bottle of Decoy TONIGHT, sistah!!!!
Monday, October 15, 2007
Paperchase Progress, and A Thought?!
Secretary of State today, and will send it to New York
Chinese Consulate for authentication today.
Masha is the Chinese lady who works at Holt that handles our dossier paperwork (by the way, she costs extra -- as she provides a "document processing service," which means nothing to those of you who have never adopted internationally, but is something we considered to be important enough to pay extra for).
Anyhoo, we were THRILLED to get this note from Masha today! As soon as the Chinese Consultate in New York "authenticates" our dossier . . . it's sent off to China to be stamped with a "Log-In Date," which is SO HUGE!!!
We can't thank enough all of our friends and family who have been with us throughout ALL of our bullshit to get to this point. Seriously, I know I crack a lot of jokes, BUT, we continue to need everybody's support, understanding, humor, prayers, friendship, and love.
I know the payoff is out there, even if it feels a loooonnnnggg way off . . . which is why blogs like this one really keep me afloat (especially when I feel as if I will give up this endless treading of water and drown):
I had shared this with Dr. J today, and we wound up having the following IM conversation:
Ms. J:
Dr. J.: I looked at it real quick, very pretty girl.
Ms. J: I looked back at the first photos of her, when they first got her, and the change is dramatic
Ms. J: CLEARLY, these people have a few bucks to throw around. T
Dr. J: milf?
Ms. J:
Dr. J: just like you will be
Ms. J: Maybe i should have called our adoption bog "but i wanna be a MILF?
Dr. J: Nice!
Getting Soft
STILL, this is the first fall/winter season in which I have been a homeowner, and thus I am more concerned about my gas bill than I have been in the past (hell, most of the apartments I lived in didn't include a separate gas bill). Thus, I have not yet been willing to flick the heat on in our house yet. But this has made for some chilly nights lately.
I used to be so much tougher when it came to being too hot or too cold in my assorted homes as I grew up. This is due to my mother, the original bill-miser, REFUSING to ever let me turn on the A/C or heat wherever we lived, even if the cost was already rolled into our monthly rent payment. The heat always bothered me more than the cold, to the point that I can actually remember CRYING, pleading for my mom to let me turn it on for just a few minutes, as my asthma made it nearly impossible sometimes to get any relief. Thank gawd once I got old enough to drive I just learned to haul ass to the mall for free A/C, or to stay overnight at a friend's house when it became unbearable. Nonetheless, I still probably harbor some lingering resentment for the sticky summer evenings in which my already-temperamental hair wound up looking like ka-ka due to my mom's refusal to A/C-accomodate me for the 15 minutes it took me to style my hair. Grrrr.
When we moved to the Bay Area in order for Dr. J to go to graduate school, my father-in-law (himself a former Bay Area resident) warned me, in his New Yahk accent, that "You'll get soft living in the Bay Area," due to the mild climate in the winters (though we had some scorching summers during the rolling blackouts, oi vey). Generally, I do NOT bitch about the cold weather, as I love wintery scenery. But when it's this chilly in my house . . . well, I begin to fear my father-in-law may be right.
Dr. J made me so friggin' happy last Thursday night, when I came home late from a political fundraiser, tired as hell & knowing I would be getting only 4 hours sleep before I had to be awake for an early-morning legislative breakfast, by surprising me with . . . having put our electric mattress pad on our big bed. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!! Ahhhh, I was in esctasy as I crawled on top of my toasty mattress!
Last night was another cold one. No heat in the house, per our attempt to NOT flick on the furnace in October. It was nice to curl up in that bed, all nice and warm, mmmmm.
But DAMN, was it difficult to get out of bed this morning, as a result. I kept hitting the snooze button on my alarm, and Dr. J kept trying to keep me from getting out of bed (damn you).
I finally swung my feet on the floor, fluffy bathrobe wrapped around me, and padded my way to the bathroom. And as I sat down on the chilled toilet I could only focus on one thought:
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Lust . . . Frosting
And then on Friday morning, it got even more intense, as this lil' item was e-mailed to me, directly by Dozen, announcing that finally, the new fall menu had arrived! And the new ones, raspberry zinger AND chocolate chip cookie??? COME TO ME!!!
How was I supposed to work that day, or even since then, knowing that this type of temptation is out there, calling my name over and over and over?!?!
Is it a WANT or a NEED? Sometimes it's hard to tell the difference. I just know that I am obsessively thinking about it, sigh. In my defense, the frosting has never let me down . . . if sin is something that can be licked, than Dozen's frosting is the devil.

