Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts

Monday, June 15, 2009

T-6

Well, it's ON. Date Night, or DOUBLE-DATE night, is on!

I am not sure which I am more excited about . . . an actual DATE NIGHT for Dr. J and I, or getting together with our totally awesome cousins, "Dan" and "Nancy" (yes, there is the need to hide their identities, because of their occupations, just like Dr. J and I have to stay semi-anonymous to protect our public identities, too)?!

This will probably be more tame than some of our previous togethers for the simple reason that we are now all parents who, no matter blitzed or blasted we get, no matter how wild the night . . . we are STILL gonna have to be up bright and early the following day with our respective little girls. Sure, both of us couples' could easily get a set of grandparents to take our Little Princesses for the night - but I don't think either couple is yet ready for that (even if our daughters are).

Dr. J and I truly need some grown-up time, away from the bitching and moaning about shit having to do with the house & bills & the other awful responsibilities that come with being an adult. And we both are guaranteed some good laughs and family gossip via Dan, with Nancy there to validate and keep all of us hooligans in check.

Thinking back over the pre-parenthood days with Dan and Nancy inspired me to pull-up and re-post my favorite photo of Dan (which I took, after Dr. J and I duct-taped the dumb ass to his floor when he got smashed at his little sister's wedding reception). I am such a smart ass that the following year I actually framed this photo and made it a Bingo prize at our annual Thankgiving gathering (we play Bingo). How can you not look forward to seeing someone who provides you with this opportunity?! And for the record, Nancy was right there when we duct-taped her husband, shaking her head and saying "it's his own fault for getting this drunk."


Fittingly, we are going to the drive in to see the new movie, "Hangover." LMAO!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Frank Discussions Among Family

My first cousin and I are very close, having been raised much like sisters. She has been an amazing source of strength to me, as well as a terrific example as a mother. And that's probably why years ago (15 years?), I took her recommendation when it came to selecting a dentist. Hullo Dr. Hot Brothers!!! One is beefcake hot, the other more preppy hot. When I was younger I was into Dr. Preppy Dentist (Dr. Jay), and she preferred Dr. Beefcake (Dr. Bryan). Now that we are older, we like both equally. Okay, more like COVET both equally.

So I just HAD to torture my cousin with the knowledge that I would see Dr. Beefcake today for a dental appointment.

The texting literally went like this ('cause I saved 'em on my phone):
  • Ms. J: " I will have a hot man in my mouth later today - Dr. Bryan!"
  • Cousin: "Enjoy sloppy seconds. I had him on Saturday morning for an appointment."
  • Ms. J: "You are just a fluffer for him. He will be ready for the real thing at 5 pm today."

Ya gotta love family!!!!!!!!!!

By the way . . . I think I primped more in the bathroom just prior to being seen by him that I do before important business meetings, LOL!

And another by the way (since my beloved cousin reads this occasionally) . . . my mouth is ACHY tonight! Oh, Dr. Bryan worked me over good! (Um, that's because I forgot to go last year and he did lots of magic today with his special TOOL, hee hee). That means there was lots of scraping, people!

I could seriously go for ice cream right now (haven't I earned it?!) I would actively whine to my husband, who would dutifully go buy some for me . . . but he is upstairs painting our bedroom, and I don't wanna take him off task (and yeah, I know it's just a clever excuse to watch the game without me bitching about how the hockey season is too phucking long!!!!!!!!!!)

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Nah Nah Nah Nah! (I Still Fit, Do YOU, Bee-yotch?!)

I love a good tradition, especially when it's mine.

So, let's recap . . .

I did it in 2005. And 2006.

I recorded it on this blog in 2007.

Again in 2008.

And now I give you 2009 . . . !!!

YEP, IT STILL FITS!!!!

Only this year I have the best accessory possible . . .

(I have a very stubborn daughter - she would only agree
to be in the photo if her froggie was included, LOL).
We celebrated over dinner tonight with champagne and our favorite cupcakes. And our Lil Pumpkin, of course.
By the way, I have thee funniest and charming story to tell about one of Dr. J's gifts to me . . . coming soon!!!

Monday, July 21, 2008

Time is Relative


"As the days grow shorter, your hours grow longer."

-- wisdom from "Mr. Bill," my little brother

Monday, July 07, 2008

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Best Week Ever


Congrats to Dr. J, since last week was your "Best Week Ever"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Of course, this was quite predictable, as you know . . . since THIS one is a holiday weekend. And then in three weeks we are taking off for another freakin' continent. OF COURSE THEN EVERYBODY WILL WANT A PIECE OF YOU!

Very proud of you, Sweetie ;o)


Monday, March 10, 2008

Monday Musings

Several little items I want to comment on . . . .

First, I am pleased to report that I spent an hour on the treadmill this evening and NO panic attack, yeah!!!!!!!! Still am on the lookout for more symptoms, and wouldn't be surprised if another occurs, but I am glad that I was able to exercise again, free of this problem :o)

Second, damn you Victoria's Secret! MUST you insist on torturing me with your pretty little things?! The latest commercial for the BioFit Bra had me hauling to the mall in the midst of Saturday's snowstorm. I just had to try it on. A very good quality, smartly designed, everyday bra. Well done! I didn't buy it, and was okay with not having the funds to do so. Much more difficult to resist were several new panties I saw hanging up . . . (sniff, sniff, pout, LOTS of pouting) . . . they're just sooooo cute and make me feel like a princess in them! It got so bad I had to text the BFF (Ms. Lori) and complain about how unfair life is. She agreed, of course, but reminded me that I must not give in. (Pouting again!)

Third, went to church on Sunday with my little brother, as his Sponsor for RCIA (he is converting to Catholicism). My Dad showed up, which surprised me (figured he'd be working or sleeping). It was nice to spend time with both of them. My brother is taking this waaaaaaay seriously, so much that it is kinda creeping the family out. I shall write about this in a future posting -- the "Spreadsheet of Sin" is worth a few giggles, I assure you ;o)

Okay, time to pack it in and go nite-nite.


Sunday, February 24, 2008

20 Things -- Check off Snow Weekend (Kimbolton)

(yes, I know we are checking things off at a rate of faster than one a month -- I don't care . . . we have our reasons)

******************************

This was the weekend we had been waiting for . . . our weekend with "The Cousins." We were going away to Ohio with all of my awesome second cousins (okay, and my Mom & Stepfather -- NOTE: my Mom only grated my nerves on Friday night, though I did briefly consider strangling her) for some fun in the snow, a bunch of silly games, and of course, the booze. Yes, the blessed booze, with thee funniest & happiest drunks you have ever met. We were psyched!

The roads were a bit dicey en route, and the snow didn't help. Still, we made decent time and arrived safely. So imagine our surprise when Dr. J went outside on Saturday morning and saw that our car had a flat tire. Gawd dammit! Like I need this NOW?! Like my phuckin' WALLET needs this now?! But first, we had to get the damn tire off of the damn car -- which proved difficult. Five grown men worked on this tire for 30 minutes, and it was still stuck. Finally, Cousin Bob (the second tallest, at 6' 5'' -- his son Nick is taller at 6' 7'') kicked the thing so hard in frustration it finally came loose. The men were triumphiant, like they had reeled in a giant fish or bagged a 10-point buck on the first day of hunting season!

I just had to take their photo . . .
(faces cropped out to protect the innocent -- but yes, that's Dr. J in the yellow parka)

Upon examination of the carcass, I mean tire, it was determined that the rim was bent, too. LORD IN HEAVEN -- why oh why must you torture me?!


Cousin Bob insisted on taking the tire into town and having the situation remedied. I was near tears at this point (frustration). Bob has been an angel to Dr. J & I as we have struggled the past few years, and he knows the past few weeks were especially heart-bruising . . . I know this was on his mind, and he wanted so badly to help us, somehow, so I let him do this for us. He returned a few hours later, saying all had been fixed, and the body shop hadn't charged him anything. We both know he is lying. This made me want to cry again. I find that at the oddest moments, I am blessed by the smallest kindnesses, which wind up making the biggest difference.

Most of Saturday afternoon was spent sled riding. There were 21 of us, in all. And it couldn't have been better.

(This sign cracked us up!)

After our terrific time spent snow tubing just two weeks prior, I didn't think it was possible to have more fun in the snow, so I busied myself as the "official paparazzi" of the family -- something I really enjoy (hey, photography is MY art, and I love it).

Soon enough, though, I agreed to turn over the camera to Cousin Debbie, and was joining everyone else as we slid down the hill the low-tech way -- with plastic saucers, cheap sleds, and even an old fashioned Flexible Flyer (damn, that thing glided!)


(Here's me and my awesome cousin Dave racing down the hill on saucers -- we nearly smacked into the barricades, LOL!)

Other sledding highlights included:

  • Dave coming down the hill with an open beer in hand
  • Tandem-sledding -- 4 people, 2 sleds -- we (yes I was in on it) wiped out on the way down
  • Dave trying to sled down the hill on a case of beer
  • Julie and Jonathan (her boyfriend, a minister) sledding with a bobble-head Jesus in hand (really, I have the photos to prove it!)
  • Zanne bringing Sammy the Dog with her on the sled
  • Bobbie Jo riding with her young granddaughters, Maya and Kyla
  • My OWN mother gliding down, face first, on a flexible flyer, and after leaving the hill coasting down the snowy street a good quarter-mile, then calling my stepfather on her cell phone to report her location when we lost sight of her, LOL
  • Lucy the Dog running down the hill alongside Cousin Kathy

The day only improved from then on . . . hell, I even took a RARE nap with Dr. J! We had a yummy dinner, more booze, played games all night, and stayed up late talking amongst ourselves. Sunday morning came waaaaaay too quick, of course.

I can't wait until next year :o)

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Bathus Interruptus

Okay, Friday was . . . crazy. I rushed from one doctor (who kept me waiting for 50 minutes, which did not help my nerves) to another. In between phuckin' Rite Aid phucked up the presciption that the first doctor insisted I had to get on immediately (grrrr, the damn pharmacist gave me the WRONG prescription! And this is for a serious medical issue. Grrrr, I am gonna have to tuck this bit of anger away for a few days until I can deal with it, via a nasty phone call to the Rite Aid corporate offices!)

Thankfully, the day ended better than it started, with me mellowing courtesy of a couple of glasses of Clos du Bois merlot, and sharing a chocolatey treat with a friend. Yum.

Saturday was a rough day for Dr. J and I, due to an event we had to attend that was tough on us, emotionally (adoption-related). We spent several hours with my brother on Sunday, pertaining to his church journey (he is becoming a Catholic and I am his sponsor).

So ANYHOO, the plan was for us to drop my little brother off at our Aunt's so he could pick up his car, and then Dr. J and I were going to use my Aunt's big spa tub for a long overdue bubblebath! We even brought the bottle of 2004 Iron Horse Wedding Cuvee that Dr. J's godparents send us each year as an anniversary present.

We were SO READY for this bubblebath, I can not overstate that point!


Dr. J drew the bath water, popped the champagne into our special glasses, and we slid into the tub. A mere 120 seconds later (I am not kidding), my Uncle begins pounding furiously on the bathroom door, and bellows in his German-accented voice "Zee water is leek-ing thru zee cee-ling!"

You have to be kidding me, right?! NOPE. He wasn't. Somehow their tub, which hadn't had a leak in 10 years, and my Aunt uses for a soak at least once a week, chose MY MOMENT OF ZEN to begin leaking through the dining room ceiling below. Unbelievable. Really.

So we drain the tub, wipe the bubbles off our bodies, and pad downstairs to stare up at the ceiling with my aunt and uncle.


I thought I was going to burst into tears out of pure frustration. I . . . just . . . wanted . . . my . . . bubblebath. (Sniff, sniff, cue pout).

As I lunched with a friend today, and related this tale of woe, he looked at me amused and said "Bathus Interruptus?!"

Grrrrrrrr.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Happy Day to My Valentines

I was driving to a doctor appointment today when a song came on the radio that brought back a flood of memories . . . it was "Solid" by Ashford & Simpson (yes, I acknowledge it's a bad video -- in a so bad it's good kind of way, LOL). I immediately grabbed my cell phone and called the man who I think of each time this classic tune is on the radio . . . my Daddy. He thanked me for the V-Day card I had sent him (I send him one every year because, after all, he was the first man I ever loved, and the first man to ever love me). I quickly instructed him to put on the station I was listening to, and then giggled as I said "Daddy, remember how we used to sing this in the car?!" There are other songs like that, ones that make me think of times spent alone with my Dad, singing in the car. I think what made them so memorable is that my Dad, a guy who throughout my childhood alternated between being ultra-smooth and an ultra-goofball, used to sing along to these songs in such a funny, dramatic, over-the-top manner that you couldn't keep a straight face when they came on. Some others that I immediately associate with my Dad are:

  • "Islands in the Stream"/Kenny Rogers & Dolly Parton (before Kenny f'ed up his face with bad plastic surgery)
  • "Separate Lives"/Phil Collins & Marilyn Martin
  • "Maneater"/Hall & Oates (Ahhh, a classic from Dad's post-divorce bachelor years)
  • "Coming Around Again"/Carly Simon (his song choice to dance with me at my wedding)

This was on my mind as I worked out at the gym. Only, with thoughts of Valentine's Day bouncing around my head, I began seeking out the songs on my Ipod that remind me of Dr. J:

Happy V-Day to all -- now everybody go cuddle ;o)

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Dear Ol' Dad

I have been dreading my business trip next week. It's going to be uncomfortable at best, but painful is what I am expecting to really encounter. Not the workload, not the hours, but some of the people I will have to be in proximity to.

This fact, coupled with financial frustration, wanting to smack my mother and stepfather, stoo-pid inlaws ("outlaws"), and the slooooow tick-tock of the calendar have all been swirling in my never still brain, culminating in a level of anxiety that is frightening.

So as much as I was looking forward to meeting up with my Dad late this morning for coffee/tea, I was expecting the inevitable "relax, Babes, it'll all be okay" mantra out of him, which would probably wind me up even tighter.

But surprise of surprises, he did no such thing. Damn if he hasn't been changing a lot over the past year, finally recognizing that I am not am alarmist but truly struggling to not either (1) go insane or (2) throw in the proverbial towel completely.

I truly think that the last-ditch effort he had to undertake to get healthy has a profound effect on him. He listens to me so much more, I mean really listens, and offers actual constructive advice and support. He reminds me to trust my judgement and decisions. It's amazing. I used to hate to let Dad see any bits of weakness in me, 'cause he is so strong. But after the incredibly difficult past couple of years of self-destruction he put our family through (and remember, I was getting the simultaneous implosion of my mother, and now she & stepfather with their latest phuck-up a few days before Christmas), my Dad has begun to emerge as an altered person.

I felt a lot better after meeting with him today. He wasn't rushed, he wasn't distracted, he wanted to reassure me and my choices. And he shared with me a really important bit of observation/wisdom, which I know I will carry with me: "People always want to give you an easy or superficial fix to what is a complicated problem. They think THEY know better. They don't."

Monday, December 31, 2007

Year in Review

Ugh, I can't believe it's time to do this. Again.

But I am big on tradition and introspection (however phucked up both may be), so I will once again write out my "good/bad/learn" list. What kinda sucks is that I thought LAST year was bad. And yet THIS year actually managed to eclipse last year's, in terms of suckiness. Which again, has me shaking my head and wondering why I pushed so hard to leave "The Land of Fruits and Nuts and Flakes." So, to Dr. J, I preface by saying, with great sincerity, "I AM SORRY" for insisting that we leave Kal-ee-forn-yah. I thought moving back east was the right thing to do. Clearly, I was wrong. If I could take it back, and move back, I most likely would. Who knows, maybe we will in a few years.

Anyhoo, here's Da List . . .

WHAT WAS GOOD:

  1. Dr. J taking the risk of starting his own practice. It took serious balls, and I am proud of him; and for his constant reassurance that I am okay, doing okay, and will be okay.

  2. Nicole's wedding.

  3. Second cousins. Dave & Natalie, Emily & Rob, Dana & Nick, Bob & Bobbie, Zanne, Beth & Joe, Julie, Buzz & Kathy . . . you have no friggin' idea how much I look forward to each and every moment I spend in your presence! You came back into our lives a few years ago to help me out when I could no longer care for my Mom on my own, and have taken care of me along the way. YOU ALL ROCK!

  4. My job. I worked hard for it, and appreciate the gift it is every day.

  5. Meeting Kirsten in person (finally). And all of her amazing and insane emails.

  6. Adrian's liquid hospitality. And her throw pillows.

  7. Lori met the love of her life AND got engaged -- all in the same year! Finally, something I prayed for gets answered by God.

  8. My Dad started to get healthy. Holding my breath it spills over to other parts of his life, too.

  9. Seeing Cirque du Solieil. Three Cheers for the "O"!

  10. For Hamster texting me at the right time. And offering to bitch-slap The Cow.

  11. L.I.D. 11/14/07!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT WAS BAD:
  1. Watching my husband continue to be treated as a second-class citizen by the LILT (Long Island Looney Toons).

  2. Endless doctor appointments and painful procedures.

  3. The shock of home ownership incidentals.

  4. Hot Tub Foliculitis.

  5. Car problems on the way back from D.C.

  6. Irresponsible parents. My own, especially.

  7. The horrifyingly stupid things people say when you lose a baby. It's astounding. Even after three babies it still cuts me to the core.

  8. Stupid local politicians. And stupid state-level ones, too.

  9. Being scared that I am going crazy, and effectively being unable to do anything about it.

  10. Self-imposed poverty.

  11. Losing Gabrielle.

WHAT I LEARNED:
  1. Naval Academy graduates can be quite kinky (who knew?!)
  2. Dr. J is a magnet for fainting strangers.
  3. HM can be horrified by bad fashion and bad taste.
  4. The expiration of a Notary's commission is a matter of national security, apparently.
  5. I can move a passport out of backlog, to the front of the processing line, and overnighted to my home in a matter of 18 hours. Or rather, I know people who can, which is equally important!
  6. Fergie's sage advice "If You Ain't Got No Money Take Yo Broke Ass Home", which has inspired HotMary and mine's semi-serious motto of "Upgrade!"
  7. Sandi is the best listener I know, and her gems are invaluable.

  8. Lori never thinks I am insane, even when I do.

  9. Dr. J's godparents are the best people I know. I'd give anything for them to adopt me, or even just him.

  10. Nobody loves the ugly, scary, mean & weak parts of me. Except for Dr. J.

  11. It will happen. I can make it happen. I can move mountains . . . of paperwork.




WHAT I AM GOING TO TO DIFFERENTLY (a new category!):

  1. Finish and begin checking off things from the "Distract" and "Prepare" lists.

  2. Make an honest, active effort to be more positive.

  3. Recommit to taking better care of me. Which means 10 more pounds to shed -- not 'cause I need to, but just for the hell of it.

  4. Strive to keep my office tidy.

  5. Be more fun. More bold.

  6. Laugh more.

  7. Try to make up with God.

  8. Force/explain to members of the local posse that I need to have "standing dates" with them (Lori, Lisa, Sandi, Shannon #2, Shannon #3, HotMary -- this means YOU, chickies!)

  9. Invite people to our home, instead of keeping them at arms length.

  10. Keep my mom and stepfather a bit more at arms length.

  11. Stay focused at work.




Sunday, December 30, 2007

Cousins and Cupcakes


Finally had the opportunity to bond with my most closest cousin (oh hell, she's more like my little sister) Sandi on Saturday. I had reached out to her and told her I needed (not a want, NEED) to spend time with her. The great thing about her is that she KNOWS all of the family shit, so there's no lag time when I vent or bounce my fears off of her -- she knows the players equally well, and that is a relief to me. Sometimes I find it too overwhleming to share intimate details with people, since there is always so much backstory that seems to take forever to explain. That's why I treasure Sandi so much. She gets it. All of it. And she doesn't try to fix it. She listens. And yet, she always seems to come up with some little gem of wisdom, just a phrase, that sticks with me and helps me re-center and re-set the course I have been trying to sail.

Over the past two years there have been three things in particular she has said to me that have stuck with me, and though she probably has no idea how much, have guided me immensely:



  1. There is no trophy given for the amount of grief one couple can endure

  2. It doesn't matter if you bring a baby home from the hospital or an airport

  3. It sounds like you need to shut out everyone and cocoon (her latest observation)

Oh, and one more thing, she thinks my sister-in-law is a phucking bitch, too. Ya gotta love that kind of support!

So after we took a long walk with her two-year-old, Maya, and went grocery shopping, I then picked up Dr. J so we could go celebrate a very important day.

It was Dozen 's 1-year anniversary! And God Bless Them, Dozen was selling cupcakes for a blessedly cheap $1 per cupcake all freakin' day!!!!!!!!! Woo-hoo, we HAD to be there!!!! Of course, I had my vanilla-vanilla, while Dr. J had his East End Stout cupcake. Then, he got that devious look in his eye and proclaimed that "we need (NEED, lol!) to split just one more!" So I gave in and let him talk me into another vanilla-vanilla. Mmmmm. Happy Anniversary to Dozen, and we anixiously await the opening of their new bakery in late-January (NOTE TO DR. J: I think that will have to be OUR anniversary date, dear!)


Thursday, December 27, 2007

Free Marty!

I had sent an excited email out to some of our close friends tonight with the following subject line:


"MAN CONVICTED OF KILLING HIS
PARENTS FREED -- AND OUR DR. J KNOWS HIM!!!"

And then brought them up to speed with the following message:

Not sure if yinz are familar with this story (been on "48 Hours" and other news mags over the years).

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,318565,00.html


Dr. J grew up in the same "well to do" Belle Terre neighborhood as Marty Tankleff. Marty was a couple years older but Dr. J knew him. Dr. J remembers it being the first day of 9th grade and riding past Marty's house on the school bus (wait, DR. J took the school bus, was the limo driver off work that day?!)

Anyhoo, he saw Marty standing outside the house, cops everywhere, and suddenly Justin Hova (in Dr. J's grade) jumps on the bus and screams "HEY, MARTY KILLED HIS PARENTS!!!!!!!"

Dr. J's mother thought Marty was guilty. Dr. J's Dad thought he was innocent, and that Jerry Steuerman did it, esp. since Jerry faked his own death (left his car running with the door open, and turned up a week later in California . . . hmmm, why didn't the detectives look into this?!) However, Dr. J offers that Jerry Steuerman owned a bagel shop and "made a damn good bagel."

Folks, THIS is what I just came back from -- four days in Long Island over Christmas, too.

*****************

Funny thing was, we drove by Marty's old house (the scene of the crime) while we were in Long Island a few days ago, and Dr. J even recounted the tale once again.

A few minutes ago Dr. J shared with me that a web site has been in existence for some time to bring attention to Marty's plight, too.

My OWN mother has long been addicted to any news on this case. Too bad Christmas is over. I could have gotten her a t-shirt.

Marty, we sincerely wish you the best -- we know you got a raw deal, dude! Really.

FREE MARTY!

Surviving the Holidays -- Part Four (Tuesday/Christmas Day)

. . . conclusion of prior post . . . .



Went over to out-laws for Christmas Dinner. The chubby S-I-L knew to stay the phuck outta my way. I am fairly convinced my no-show at her breakfast made the point, as she steered damn clear of me, 'cept for the utmost polite of dinnertime manners. She even played uber-helper for the stepmother-in-law, making sure each of the 30 assembled dinner guests had enough to eat, clearing their plates, filling their drink glass (not to mention her own), yadda. Whatever. Have another cookie, you cow.

Outlaws were okay, apparently on their best behavior, too. If not for The Cow's bullshit the night before, we'd have been much more comfortable. But Dr. J and I were on edge, understandably.

Still, we survived Christmas Day. Sigh. But it was bittersweet, with tears sprinkled in. How could they not be? We'll never forget what this day was supposed to be. Never. I highly doubt I will ever be able to enjoy this holiday ever again.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Surviving the Holidays -- Part Three (Monday/Christmas Eve)

Monday started off okay enough. A little bit of melancholy for me this morning, but tried to get re-focused by thinking about the pending yumminess of a few slices from Renzo's. And oh my, was the 18-month wait of that deliciousness ever worth it! Ahhhhhh! So, our Pizza ranking list looks something like this:

  1. Renzo's (Port Jefferson, Long Island)
  2. Mineo's (Squirrel Hill, PA)
  3. Di Pietro's (West View, PA)
  4. Sir Pizza (Ross, PA)

After we were sated, we drove around Port Jefferson to take photos of all of the places important to Dr. J's childhood memories . . . the idea was for us to have a photo record that we could share with Ping-Ping someday. We took photos of his favorite beaches, the houses he loved in, the Village shops, his high school, the ferry & pier, and of course Renzo's. I know I got some terrific shots of the beach terrain, which I am hoping will show up well enough in black & white that I can have one printed for inclusion in my proudly growing dining room gallery of black & white photos.

We then did a quick swing by the house which Dr. J's father and stepmother recently moved to. Hmmm. A lot of strangeness here, and things just not making sense. We speculated privately, so I will refrain from posting any thoughts about this in my blog.

We were then expected at the home of Dr. J's brother, sister-in-law, and our two young nephews. The boys were great, and the visit was going well. We then accompanied them to dinner at the home of the sister-in-law's parents. We were having a lovely visit there, too, and then out of freaking nowhere, post-dinner, my sister-in-law decided to be a MASSIVE BITCH and give us all sorts of completely undeserved grief about shit which she knows nothing about. On top of all this, she KNEW what a sucky day Xmas Eve and Xmas Day were going to be for us, and STILL she persisted. I tried to hold out as long as I could, but yep, there they were, the big tears! That bitch drove me to tears for a good 20 minutes. But of course, she knew it was for our own good WTF?! Go drink some more chardonnay and pop some more food in your chubby mouth, bitch!!!

Thank God for my Hamster texting me as we drove back to the hotel, or I don't think I'd have survived. Seriously, I turned the corner when Hamster texted "I want to come up and slap her for you!"

So, in a move that surprised even myself, I refused to go back to the sister-in-law's house this morning for breakfast. Phuck her. This is MY DAY to be selfish. She doesn't deserve my tears, my rage, my anger, my grief. I made Dr. J go, though, so he could spend time with our nephews. Later on I will join him for Christmas dinner at his Dad's.

I didn't want to let this day be ruined by what happened last night, so I tried to do something positive and proactive by focusing on the adoption. Thus I spent my alone time this morning surfing the 'net, learning more about the other adoption path we have decided to begin pursuing, which is adopting locally, of perhaps a black or mixed-race child. I am learning alot, and even came across an article that made me feel better about my Chinatown Meltdown the day prior.

I don't know what is going to happen with the Long Island Looney Toons, today or in the future, but I have been figuring out that opening our hearts to children who exist right now and who need us, as much as we need them, will give us the healing and push we need to let some of this background noise bullshit start to mute. So I am now reading profiles of "waiting kids" in earnest, trying to imagine our lives with them, and theirs with us.

All I want for Christmas . . . is to take a half-dozen of them home. Now.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Surviving the Holidays - Part One (Saturday recap)

On Saturday morning we began our Christmas Getaway. I told Dr. J two months ago that I simply could not be home for the holidays this year, so we decided to go to New Yahk, in spite of the tension and bullshit that his parents have unfairly pitched our way. We committed to spending very little time with them, and spending lots of time making ourselves happy, and to keep busy.

Our goal this year is simply stated, but difficult to achieve : survive the outlaws, and make it through the holidays without too many tears.

The drive out was pretty good - 'cept for some traffic trying to cross the George Washington Bridge, which, as always, was backed up. Having the EZ Pass saved us time in this regard.

Before I forget, we'd like to give a shout out to the rest stop in Allentown, PA. First of all, the giant Cabela's beckoned us from the highway as if to say "welcome, friends!" (even though we didn't go in). But what really impressed us were the plethora of interesting fast food combos -- sure, we've all seen the KFC/Pizza Hut shared space before, but Taco Bell/Long John Silver's?! Hullo, hushpuppies (we indulged!) Even better, we saw the first of the new Dunkin Donuts/Baskin Robbins eateries -- YOWZA! What a freakin' incredible culinary idea!!!

Once in New Yahk, we drove to make our dinner appointment. Within 30 seconds of entering the lovely, restored, 18th Century farmhouse that Dr. J's godparents reside in (in Douglaston, a ritzy part of Queens, NY), we were handed a glass of Rustico prosecco. Que Bella!!! Uncle Joey has served us this amazingly light yet soothing beverage before, but each time I am bowled over by its light loveliness. This was followed by hours of delicious food, and wonderful conversation, in which we received lots of encouragement and support. I swear, I love these people as much as is humanly possible -- they must be the two finest people I have ever met. I wish they'd adopt us. Really.

They loved our tiny Christmas gift to them, fussing over it as if we'd bought them a new car. And they meant it. And they got it. And they get us. Which is the best gift of all.

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Pride . . . and Prayers

It's Election Day. My shoulders and neck are one giant knot. All I want is a glass of wine, a lengthy deep-tissue massage, and to have one moment of tranquility. Actually, make that a bottle of wine.

Two quick items before I retire for two hours of television-viewing ("The Unit" and "Cane" -- meow to all the men) . . .

  1. HAMSTER -- I am so very proud of you, and your grit. Can't wait to hear all of the details about your day, and the those to come
  2. DADDY -- My Dad is having very major surgery tomorrow. It will change a lot of things in our family afterwards. Despite all of the crap he and the stepmonster have put us through over the past few years . . . I still need him. He's a terrific Dad, and I am lucky to have had him as long as I have.

So I will be doing a lot of praying tonight. And respecting my Dad's wishes by NOT hanging out at the hospital. But my heart will be there, just the same.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Birthday Forecast

My maternal grandmother (Sagittarius) got me hooked on astrology when I was just a wee little chickie. I can remember reading "Sun Signs" when I was, geez, 6 years old?! My Dad is similarly hooked on his horoscope, to the point that he calls our disabled aunt every morning just to have her read his horoscope (Aries) over the phone to him. No, we are not letting it rule our lives or anything like that. Still, I know that sometimes the general description of a Scorpio (me) is eerily on the mark.

So I thought it might be fun to note and record my the various sources are fortelling about my birthday, today:

From Astrology.com, my birthday reading:

You have a sensible and realistic outlook on life and your two feet are always planted firmly on the ground (though you may, on occasion, have your head in the clouds). Others often see you as a rock of strength, solid, reliable, dependable, and constant. You are, in fact, amazingly consistent for you possess great powers of endurance and do not like to make changes or adjustments in your regular routine. You do things deliberately and methodically and do not easily accommodate the unexpected. Though you have a gentle, even soft, appearance, you are enormously strong-willed and stubborn. You go at your own pace and refuse to be rushed or pushed into anything before you feel sure about it. You can be coaxed and persuaded by charm, beauty, love, or affection - but never forced. You won't fight either, but simply stubbornly resist any attempt to coerce you to do something you do not want to do. Quiet, deep, emotionally complex and intensely private, you are not a person who is easy to get to know and understand. You are extremely sensitive but disinclined to show it, and you allow only a special few into your inner world. Like a wary animal, you are cautious and mistrustful of those you do not know until you "sniff them out". You are very, very instinctive and intuitive. You usually have a strong, immediate gut reaction to people, even though you may be unable to clearly articulate why you feel as you do. Your feelings and perceptions go deeper than words.

From Yahoo.com's 2007 Overview for Scorpio:

Passion carries you far this year in the realms of creativity and expression. Getting in touch with and appreciating more of your passionate nature will transform you in a way that results in putting more money in the bank. You could easily work as an advisor for big companies or in public relations. You understand what motivates people to do a good job and will find yourself in situations where people want your advice. Your creative insight expresses itself in dynamic ways and you will gain lots of recognition.

You have a very good support system in both your career and home life, and will learn that perfect order is taking place in your life at this time. Since your career has gotten off to such a great start this year, by summertime you will have more time on your hands to become romantically involved in a new relationship (or rekindling of old), which you've been thinking about for quite some time. You will be receiving some new and dynamic surprises and will be inspired to do some new and out-of-the-ordinary things in both your career and personal life.

You could enjoy spending time traveling to foreign lands and be drawn to observing others' ideas and cultures. You love to study. You will find that your relationship gives you lots of space to breathe, and yet you still have lots of spare time to take care of your own needs as well. You'll need tons of physical interaction to satisfy that wild passion of yours. Having massages, going to hot springs and being close to nature will bring a lot of balance and harmony to your life.

From the NY Post.com, my birthday reading:

October 24, 2007 -- It's okay to be serious about your aims in life but not so serious that you lose your ability to have fun. Every time you feel the corners of your mouth begin to turn down this year you must think of something amusing that gets you smiling again. It's not so hard - life is meant to be fun.

From CafeAstrology.com, my forecast from 10/24/07 - 10/24/08:

Uranus is a strong player in your Solar Return chart this year, as this electric planet is in hard aspect to the Sun, Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. As such, some level of unpredictability and/or tension is likely to be a theme in the year ahead. Your life speeds up with this influence, as you adapt to the many changes in your life. You march to the beat of your own drummer this year. Your behavior may be willful, however, which could get you into predicaments from time to time! You may often be tempted to throw out practical or traditional considerations in favor of more exciting or stimulating plans. Unexpected changes in plans or events can test your patience. However, they could stimulate you to try new approaches and they certainly act to cut boredom. Your creativity is stimulated this year, but so is your excitability and your need for freedom. You are likely to be more outspoken than usual, perhaps even rebellious.

Busy, busy, busy! The Sun conjunct Mercury in your Solar Return chart suggests that you have a lot to do this year. At times, you may feel like the pace of your life is running ahead of you. You can be especially productive, however, in all types of communications--writing, speaking, learning, teaching, and so forth.

Mercury sextiles Pluto, suggesting that your mental faculties are attuned to otherworldly impressions, offering you increased insight, psychological understanding and awareness, and focused attention. You are inclined to do a lot of “digging”, researching, analyzing, investigating, and getting to the bottom of things. Increased psychological awareness of yourself and others can benefit you greatly, and employing strategy in your decision making is easier than usual this year. Relationships with younger people may be especially rewarding and meaningful.

Venus opposes Uranus and squares Jupiter in your Solar Return chart, and some disruptions in your friendships and attachments are possible this year. Over-inflated expectations is something to watch out for. You may overvalue something (or someone), perhaps in an attempt to dramatize your life. You may be especially sociable, in the mood to party, dramatic, extravagant, and inclined to overindulge as a result of a feeling of inner discontent and a desire for more from life than daily routines. Unusual attractions (to people and things) can have you acting on a whim. You may deal with freedom versus closeness issues in your relationships. It may be that you experience sudden changes or breakups with a friend or lover. However, the chance of a sudden new friendship is just as likely. At the root of this is a stronger taste for the unusual. What is familiar is less exciting to you than what is new and different. If a relationship seems to threaten your sense of freedom, you may have an easy time separating from it. Some fireworks in both your social and financial lives are to be expected, keeping things fresh and exciting. The best way to handle this energy is to open yourself up to the need for change in your love life or with regards to how you spend and make money--or both. Get in touch with this need for new experiences and/or attitudes so that changes are not forced upon you.

With the Sun sextile the North Node of the Moon, you are likely to form new relationships or connections that further your spiritual growth, or to enhance existing relationships with a spirit of camaraderie. People in authority regard you favorably for the most part. Events take place in which you feel like you are moving forward and growing into a new phase of your life.

The year ahead is one of rapid growth and insistent self-expression. Your social life is bound to involve some fireworks as changes are required of existing relationships. Opportunities to advance in your career come when you employ strategy in your decision making. The need to make changes, and for more freedom in your life in general, can lead to restlessness this year. Life is very busy and quick in pace. Be sure to avoid overly impulsive actions.


2007 is a Number Seven year for you. Ruled by Neptune. This is a year of preparation, chance, and refinement. It is not a time of dramatic changes. Instead, it's a year when reflection on the past is helpful, and when refinements to your life path should be made. It's a good year to study and analyze. Unexpected twists to your life story and "chance" meetings are probable. Advice - take stock of your life in order to prepare for more exciting years to come, examine the past and plan for the future, get in touch with your deepest needs and uncover your personal power, don't strain yourself or actively try to expand.

2008 will be a Number Eight year for you. Ruled by Saturn. This is a year of power and accomplishment. Actively seeking to expand, taking educated risks, and moving forward are highlighted. This is a year of opportunity, particularly in the material and business world, and opportunities need to be seized. It's generally not a year to find a new love partner, simply because the focus is on the material world and your place in the world. This is a problem-solving year in which you can expect real, tangible results. Advice - take action, plan ahead, seize opportunities.


And Finally:

Your personal ruling planets are Mars and Venus.

You are without a doubt a person of strong magnetic presence and will always be at your best when in the company of the other sex.

Your dramatic flair and larger than life gestures attract the attention of those around you and result in your being considered the life of the party.

You are a very devoted family person and loyal to the needs of loved ones. You adhere to the principles of domestic life and the needs of children too.

In matters of finance, you are very capable in stretching a dollar and always appear to be well to do even if you're scratching. Venus being your ruler grants you exceptional taste and refinement in your life choices and attire too!

Music, art and literature will always be an important ingredient of your life!

Your lucky colours are white and cream, rose and pink.

Your lucky gems are diamond, white sapphire or quartz crystal.

Your lucky days of the week Friday, Saturday, Wednesday.



My Dad called me at lunchtime today. And he read me MY horoscope. What a great moment, espcially since he has no idea I have this blog and had written about this topic :o)





Sunday, October 07, 2007

Asides

A bunch of little things this weekend that kept me busy . . . .

* BARKTOBERFEST -- as usual, a very good time! A plethora of booze, munchies, and desserts. Best of all, I got to see all of my favorite cousins (minus Zanne, who was back in Ohio). And I got more psyched about going to "Wusster" next weekend, where I will see Zanne, and we shall frolic in the apple orchards (do I frolic?! Hmmm, probably not. I can skip, though).


* PARENTS -- Holy Shit, sometimes (no make that most of the times), when I dare venture out in public with my mother and stepfather, it feels like I am taking two little kids with me. Seriously. They either are easily distracted (hullo bright shiny object!) , bitching and moaning, or lumber on their feet like freakin' gazelles. And THEN they have the audacity to mock how fat everybody around them is getting?! Pot -- kettle. Kettle? Pot. (I am not trying to be mean -- but I really had ENOUGH this weekend -- and I had even woke up in a good mood on Saturday).


* DETOX -- I am fairly convinced that the past month's partying and general debauchery has caught up with me. I feel sluggish and less motivated to be at my physical best. So I am trying REALLY hard to get back on track. Fresh fruit, more water, EVEN LONGER workouts at the gym, and (gasp!) no wine. Okay, okay, maybe cold turkey is too extreme?! Start with LESS drinking.