I Guess I Gotta Do My List

I strongly considered not doing my annual Year in Review List for my blog. It's just been such a rough year, that I have been feeling like, why the hell should I bother? But I looked back over what I had written in previous years, and thought I'd give in to tradition and try to come up with something to record, at least for tradition's sake (which I am big on). So here goes . . . .

WHAT WAS GOOD:

1. Getting to know Kirsten, even if it's only through e-mail. What a hilarious treasure she is (and has provided endless fantasy moments for Dr. J). And she has given me some small sliver of hope.
2. Apple-picking in Wooster, Ohio.
3. A wonderful, much-needed visit by my Father-in-Law.
4. Finding a new job. Free At Last, Free At Last!!! Shove it, Guido!
5. Maintaining a full year of NO credit-card debt for Dr. J & I.
6. Distractions . . . sometimes you just have to have them!
7. Adrian/ManHands -- always keeps me amused with her wacky adventures.
8. Dear, dear, dear friends, like Hamster & Lori -- girls, you sustain me over & over & over again. And dear, dear, dear neighbors, like RKB, and Diane & "Marty."
9. Dr. J getting his ass in gear, recognizing that "It's Time."
10. Mom & Lou are reunited and it feels so good.


WHAT WAS BAD:

1. My close friend went back to a man who is an abusive husband & father, and told me I was a "horrible person" for "not supporting her choices." Yeah, as if. Sorry, I ain't playin', hon. When you're ready, call me and I will help you, again. MY word is good.
2. The insane crap Dr. J has had to deal with in pursuit of office space. Unbelievable.
3. Having to eat so much shit at my former job -- see ya, High School!
4. Feeling compelled to lie about our Christmas plans.
5. Rosie O'Donnell being allowed back on the air. GO DONALD!!!
6. The 24th of every month.
7. No more E.D. Hill on Fox & Friends each weekday morning. Miss her!
8. Having to give up an accrued 6 weeks of sick time I had at High School.
9. The mid-term elections.
10. Losing Casey.



WHAT I LEARNED:

1. Women can make some VERY stupid choices. Continually.
2. Bubble baths are very important. Thank you, HotMary, for reminding me of that!
3. An HSG test frickin' hurts -- I am a super-tough cookie, and whew, I still shudder at the memory. Sign me up for military boot camp -- it has to be easier.
4. That I am seriously doubting this ol' "There is a Plan" B.S. Please. Spare me.
5. People say the most insensitive things. Just shut up. Say you're sorry, and offer to cry with me. If you can't manage that, then refer to the advice on shutting up.
6. Life continues to be very rough since moving back to PA.
7. John Kerry IS as big of an elitist ass as we've suspected all along.
8. People STILL don't get how serious national security is.
9. Welfare queens, the unemployed, drug addicts, smokers, minority women, and chicks who are bad with money are thee most fertile bunch of bitches on the plant.
10. Nothing makes much sense to me anymore. Confusion can reign supreme.

On the Eve of Christmas

In a few hours Dr. J and I will leave for our special, much-needed, Christmas getaway. We are looking forward to spending the night in luxurious accomodations, playing in the snow, and forgetting life's troubles . . . for a while. I know he is going to be so excited when he opens his Christmas gift, too!

However, I can't let the Christmas season pass without offering a few random observations about what I've seen, heard, and experienced lately:

* Why do people wait until the last-minute to shop? I have never understood this. Do a little along the way, and you will avoid the stress of the final shopping weekend before Chirstmas, folks!

* The Sportman's Outlet is a totally cool place to kill time! We went there yesterday in search of ski pants (mine seem to have disappeared, which is not surprising considering the enormous number of times I have moved in my life), and had a blast checking out all of the cool hunting and fishing stuff they have to offer -- WOW! Who knew?!

* Glitter cards should be outlawed. Let me offer a short, holiday anecdote, which happens to be entirely true . . . . Last week I came home to a stack of newly arrived Christmas cards. Being pressed for time, but wanting to open them, I took a letter opener and the stack of envelopes into the bathroom with me, and proceeded to open them while sitting on The Throne (oh, save your horror, my faithful readers -- you have all done this, I just am willing to admit it). Anyhoo, I have never been a fan of cards with glitter on them, as some miniscule piece of glitter invariably winds up on my face and I can never seem to get rid of it -- it just follows me everywhere. So when I open one card in particular, and find that the entire front of the card is covered in glitter, I am already nervous. As is usually the case with glittery cards, the glitter becomes slightly dislodged during transit, and thus as I open the card a cascade of glitter falls off of the card, and straight into my lap. My bare, naked, exposed lap. Sigh. This is not gonna be good -- because the night before I had done some, uh, major grooming. And when I stood up, well, I now have a sparkly va-jay-jay. Nice. And I am cursing like a sailor as I try to carefully wipe away all of the glitter, so it doesn't get wiped up inside me, 'cause I can just imagine having to explain THIS to my gynecologist, should an infection result! So GREAT -- jut because someone out there LOVES glitter cards, I got the Christmas treat of a porn star va-jay-jay, thanks to the glitterati!!! Yeah, Merry FRICKIN' Christmas.

This stuff ONLY happens to me, I swear. It's good to know that I can make people laugh, though, with my openness about the bizarre and strange shit that happens in my life.

*** [NOTE: Hamster, I am NOT referring to your Christmas card, which did have a small amount of glitter -- trust me, the card that caused the trouble was NOT yours, babe!] ***

What a Difference a Week Makes

Survived my first full week at my new job. Though considering I was out of the office at a conference for 4 out of 5 days, it was kind of a surreal first week . . . nothing like being thrown into the deep end of the swimming pool, eh?!

There are moments when I am so excited about what lays ahead of me, and I am so happy to have landed this rather plum gig (especially considering some of the folks I beat out for it)! And then there are moments in which I am absolutely overwhlemed, and wondering what the heck am I doing?

Thank goodness Dr. J remembers the person I used to be, and reminds me that I once had the necessary confidence, and magic, required to do this type of profession successfully. And he has let me know that I will get it back, and recognize myself when that happens.

And his confidence feels good to me. Real good.

Goodbye High School

Friday was my last day at my old job, which I have come to refer to by its code name of "High School." It's aptly named, because of the gossip factor, cliques, people, and behaviors that were eerily similar of high school -- and I will admit that even I was not immune!

One of the strangest and yet heartening things to have happened during my last few days involved the e-mail note I sent out to my contacts informing them I was leaving, my new contact info, yadda, yadda. I must have received close to 75 replies from these folks (all outside of High School), thanking me for all of my help, telling me how professional I was, how much they enjoyed working with me, and so on. I wanted to print them out and tape them all over that jerk "Guido's" office, just to show him how wrong he was about me.

Even though I am thrilled to have escaped from the miserable clutches of one hypocritical, juvenile, complete jerk boss -- Guido -- (I had three in all, but only one was a problem), it was still hard to leave. Partly because I had been beaten down emotionally and had lots of self-doubt about my abilities, I am quite nervous about the huge, big, important repsonsibilities I will be taking on at my new job. And of course, I am leaving behind the daily interaction I had with some dear friends. So there were tears on Friday, and some internal second-guessing, but I know that I have to move forward -- for many, many reasons . . . some professional, but even more personal.

So tomorrow I will turn the page, and begin a new chapter. A fresh start . . . a clean slate.