We Have a Winner

Finally, finally, I have found a replacement.

Ever since Casual Corner went out of business, I have miserably been auditioning all sorts of candidates to replace my former favorite line of pantyhose. I loved Casual Corner's hosiery, because it took a lot to rip or snag them -- and despite this, they didn't feel thick or look geriatric.

After suffering for several months, and a great deal of research (including over the internet), we have a winner . . .

VICTORIA'S SECRET LOW-RISE!

Ahhhh . . . not only do they look spectacular, but they feel like silk.

And they feel absolutely divine. Really.

Thanksgiving Day

Today seems like the most appropriate day of the whole year to take a moment to give thanks for the blessings in my life. So here is a list of what I am thankful for:

• Being married to the kindest, funniest, and most supportive husband that could possibly exist in this world.
• My friend Lisa, who in addition to making me laugh so hard it hurts, was truly "there for me" over the summer as I grieved the most painful loss of my life. She'll never know what a lifeline she was for me.
• That my Mom and Stepfather are "Reunited and It Feels So Good," as the song goes. Though their lives are incredibly hectic, they genuinely seem happy, and this relieves me and Dr. J of a lot of previous care-taking time and energy that had been devoted to helping my Mom adjust to their painful 3-year separation.
• Sandi, my cousin, for all of her wise counsel and tremendous understanding. I am not sure when I stopped being the "Big Sister" in our relationship, but she has certainly taken on the role, and helped convinced me that I am not crazy.
• Having the best military in the world. And the smartest, too.
• For our terrific neighbor and handy neighborhood lawyer, RKB!
• Dr. J's lips -- I could kiss them forever and still never be done with them.
• Vince Flynn's brilliant novels.
• My two favorite e-mail buddies, "ManHands" and "MILF the MilkMaid" out in Kal-ee-forn-yah, who make each day go much faster.
• The complete faith I have in Dr. J opening his new practice.

My Big Fat New Job

Yes, I did it -- and in one week's time I will be FREE from "High School" (what I call my current place of employment) and the clutches my evil boss, "Guido."

I have landed a dream job -- at least a dream job for ME, anyway. Of course, my ultimate dream job is Chief of Staff to the Vice-President of the United States. Why not the Top Dog himself? Eh, too much pressure, too many hassles and long nights. The Vice-President gets to do more fun and less pressure-filled things, like fly to Turkey for a funeral, go on a listening tour in Asia, yadda, yadda. Yeah, definitely more fun and varied, but still important and exciting and full of power-exerting moments.

But anyway, back to my new employment. It feels so good to know that I landed this gig from over 140 applicants! It's like being crowned Miss America, only without the whole evening gown competition (though I do look fabulous in an evening gown!). I am so excited to have finally found an opportunity to reclaim so much of the awesome job I had back in Kal-ee-forn-yah, which I loved!!!

Everyone keeps telling me how proud they are of me. And you know what? I am proud of me, too.

I Love It When A Plan Comes Together

I've hemmed, I've hawed (can one haw?), and gone back and forth on whether to fork over the dough to have my Christmas Dream realized. But I finally took the leap.

We are going to wake up Christmas morning at Nemacolin!

Yep, run that bubble bath, pour the champagne, and plop those chocolate-covered strawberries on a silver platter next to the tub. Mmmmm!!! (Cue the porn music?!)

And if I had any lingering doubts, they were put to rest when karma kicked in -- I had noticed that two spots on their web site quoted different prices for the room I wanted. I figured that one was a mistake, and that they had forgotten to increase the cost in accordance with the Christmas holiday. But I was gonna work that to my advantage!

When I called to make the reservation I was quoted the more expensive room rate. Hmmmm. When I pointed out that I was looking at their web site simultaneously, and it showed the lower, non-holiday room rate, I was put on hold for a few minutes. When the lady came back on, she told me that Nemacolin would honor the lower rate on their web site. YIPPEE!!! (And good business practice by them -- cause this Trophy Wife would have raised hell had I not prevailed!)

Now it's a day later. A few minutes ago I checked the Nemacolin web site. Yesterday it said $260 per night (plus taxes). Today, it's $415.

Ah, I love a good deal! Karma, baby ;o)

Uh, We Have a Timeline, People!

So things has been moving along nicely with Dr. J's plan to open his own practice. The business plan came together, he met with the bank -- and got a loan from the first bank he met with! Woo-hoo!

In the meantime, he's been busy trying to find a place in which to house his new office. I can't believe what friggin' ordeal this has been! The first place he liked, which had a good location and a great layout, started majorly pissing him off because they sent our commercial realtor a 17-page lease, full of clauses and language that annoyed our lawyer (whom we trust and adore). When Dr. J tried to work out some of the issues with the building's management company, they acted like major asses, and were downright rude in some of their e-mail replies.

Thus, Dr. J began looking at other spaces, and found one he liked even better, nearby. This place only had a 6-page lease, and our lawyer was happy! So things we're moving along, right?! Sorta. The building owner (an eye doctor) has not been, uh, keeping pace with our timeline. Our realtor understands how important it is to have the buildout completed quickly and the lease signed, because so much depends upon those two factors . . . until those are resolved, Dr. J can't order equipment (which will take 3 weeks delivery), can't order stationary or business cards (need an address!), and can't plan his grand opening. In the meantime, he has begun to have a web site built for his new practice. That does not come cheap! And he will have to use part of his loan money to pay for it . . . and as soon as he dips into the loan funds, the clock starts ticking on repayment. But without having an office ready and open for business, there are no patients to see, no insurance companies to bill, no copayments to collect, yadda, yadda.

Last night the building owner finally got back with the cost of the buildout, which seemed on the high side. And again, he does not seem to fully graps the urgency of getting his ass in gear. THUS, my cousin Buzz (who works in and is knowledgeable about construction matters) was able to arrange for his colleague to come over and check out the office and give a second opinion. However, Dr. J has patients to see this afternoon (gotta keep up the facade at his current place of employment) . . . therefore, I will be meeting with contractor and the realtor later today.

So why do scenes from the movie The Money Pit keep flashing through my brain? I am not worried about the money, so much as hearing some dude named Curly uttering the phrase"TWO WEEKS!"

In Case There Was Any Doubt

John Kerry is an elitist, commie-lovin', blame-America ass.

This latest statement, which is so incredibly insulting to every man or woman who has ever served, is only further proof, and the latest in a series of ignorant remarks he's made which are highly revealing of the attitudes he possesses. So spare me on the "botched joke" bullshit. It wasn't. It was the truth revealed in his heart and mind.

I am fully prepared to provide evidence to support my contention, as well as the research demonstrating how educated and smart our military is, but then Michelle Malkin wrote a brilliant piece that saved me the trouble. Damn, smart AND gorgeous -- she's definitely one of my idols, and if my husband could snag her somehow (and Sweetheart, I genuinely you wish the best in this endeavour!), I would fully support him leaving me for her -- she's that amazing!

But back to the matter at hand -- John "Ghengis Khan" Kerry . . . dude, don't ever, EVER, think for one second that we will forget how you sung Kumbaya with people who called my father, a Marine Field Medic who was saving lives as the Viet Cong tried to kill him in the jungle, a "babykiller." And also, don't think that we will ever forgive your pals who spit (really!) on my father-in-law, an Air Force Captain and Flight Surgeon during Viet Nam.

Go back to your estate and ride your bike. Or windsurf.

I'm Dreaming of a Bubble Bath Christmas . . .

Dr. J and I are trying to decide what to do for the upcoming Christmas holiday. Normally, we'd spend Christmas Eve with my Dad's side of the family, go to Midnight Mass, sleep in on Christmas Day, and then Dr. J would cook Christmas dinner for my Mom's side of the family.

But we have decided, for many personal reasons, that we need to be by ourselves this Christmas and just focus on each other, instead of taking care of everyone else (okay, maybe that's me who is taking care of everyone else!)

Lately, my biggest "Blue Sky" moments have been coming courtesy of an extremely hot bubble bath. My dear friend, Hot Mary, turned me on to these body bars sold by a company called Lush. You simply put them in the tub as it's filling up, and it dissolves into the most amazing bath experience ever! Yes, I am essentially paying $6 to take a bath (that's how much one costs), but it is soooooo worth it. The Ma Bar smells absolutely divine . . . and it makes my skin feel like satin. Hot Mary is a fan of the Sex Bomb fizzy.

So when it came time to think about how, if it were up to me, I would want to celebrate Christmas, well . . . nothing would be more splendid than to be in a big, deluxe, whirlpool bathtub with Dr. J this Christmastime, as we sip champagne and toast one another. Mmmmmm!

Now we just have to decide where to go (and for me to agree to spend the money).

But you can bet that several Ma Bars will be in my suitcase, wherever we go.